During my first day at work (I spoke no French), I had my first meeting with my new boss. During this meeting she started talking to her boss across the hall (in French) and after a while they started to seriously yell at each other. Comments were flying across the hallway in what seemed an increasingly heated discussion.

Now where I’m from people don’t generally yell at each other in professional situations. The Dutch I know are generally laid back and calm. They can be direct and angry, but in a professional setting, they rarely shout. When someone yells it signals impotence and lack of character on their part. It signals that they are not in control. In the Netherlands (as far as I know) yelling by a boss only occurs in the event of crucial failures. That is why I thought my boss in Paris was getting fired.

The French however are much more outspoken in their discussions. Perhaps I would even describe them as more passionate than the Dutch I know. In France whenever people raised their voice at me I felt somewhat disrespected and in the beginning even intimidated. However being a guest in this culture, the yelling lost it’s effect on me.

I learned that in an intercultural setting, things aren’t always what they seem. It also showed me that the Dutch way isn’t necessarily the right way. After 3 years in the French context I might even have taken on some of this behavior myself.

But don’t worry, if I ever yell at you, you won’t get fired.

I heard about these terms the first week we were here during intercultural training. I am in no way an expert so please forgive me any errors. Let me start by explaining the difference between the two terms:

Monochronic

A monochromic person has a very strict way of viewing time. Time is to be used efficient and spend on useful things. Meetings in companies need to have an agenda, start on time, follow the agenda and finish on schedule. During the meetings actual decisions are taken and real work is done. Monochrinic people like to have fixed projects with targets deadlines and outcomes. The most extreme monochromic concept is that of being able to waste time.

Polychronic

The polychromic are the opposite of this (you guessed it). For a polychromic person dealing with time is a more flexible thing. In a business context this can be seen in meetings starting later, with a limited agenda. The work is done outside meetings. For polychromic people time is more flexible. Every moment is a chance to build relationships with people and to discover new things. The most extreme quote I heard on this is: ” Life is in the hands of God, so why run for the train?”.

We have experienced that the French are generally much more towards the polychromic. For example, when the land lord made an appointment to send some builders over they showed up several hours late. Lines at the supermarket do not go very fast. At work meetings start late and begin with discussing non subject related things. The advantage of this flexibility is that it is easier to cancel or move meetings, there seems more time to relate to people. Although work and private are strictly separated.

The downside is that things progress less quick and efficient. There are less rules on outcomes and less targets. There is less to count on or plan, visitors for example are usually late.

So my question to you is: which one are you? If you come here your monochromic time view will be challenged if it is not at work it will be somewhere else.  I know mine has.

I started jogging, I have done so now for 3 weeks. Every Sunday morning I run as soon as I wake up (twice 7.30 now and once 10.30 . As I was running along the Seine river, looking back at our first period here I realized some parallels between jogging and our transition. Let me share some of them here with you.

It looks great when you plan to do it but…

Whenever I decide to go jogging I realize in advance what satisfaction it will bring after I have done it. When I start running, my body starts protesting and I think: “O no what have I started? My bed was so nice and warm etc”. However, then I think again of the satisfaction I will have when I am done, that keeps me going. The same goes for the transition. Before me moved I was in a state similar of the moment right before I start jogging. The first week I felt absolutely terrible here. I wasn’t able to speak the language, we knew no one. We didn’t know where to find what and how to get things done. Like jogging I started feeling great about the move but when we begun everything in me started protesting.

Keep going…

After my body has begun protesting, I decide to keep on going. I can still go back but I keep focusing on the fact that it will do me good when I continue. I get into some kind of running rhythm. I find a comfortable way of placing my feet and syncing my breath. My body accepts the fact that I am running. I can start enjoying my surroundings and start thinking. I start to set goals, like where I will have my first break etc. The same goes for our transition. After our first week we got a lot of things arranged, bought the necessities, I got into a normal daily rhythm etc. This is the first period of enjoying the fact of living abroad. Experiencing all the new things and the culture. It is a great period.

The first break down…

After the first long period of running I become short of breath. My body starts protesting. Looking at the scenery has starting to become “normal”. All of a sudden I realize what I am doing. That there is still a long way to go before I am back home. It is the moment where I need to have a pause. Stop running for a moment and start walking. This has been the last week and will probably be the next weeks. Everything that used to be new about living in France is now normal. I start missing the “normal” things of the Netherlands, but also friends and family. The new daily rhythm seems a lot harder than the old one. I start asking myself the why questions: why have I done this? why France? Why haven’t I taken the more easy way of staying in the Netherlands?

These questions are the same as what happens when I start to run again. After the short walking break my body starts protesting even worse than before. However knowing the satisfaction of it that awaits me when I come home I keep going. After a couple of hundred meters I start enjoying again… until the next pause.

These are just some similarities I see. Even though I know that end benefit to me as a person, as professional. There are times when this transition is hard, and they will keep coming. I just need to take the proverbial break, and then start going again. But along the way, I enjoy the run very much!

When we bought the Peugeot the bureaucracy began. We had to fill in lots of forms. One for the seller one for the vendor and one for the “prefecture”. Some days after I went to the “Sous-Prefecture” of Saint Germain en Laye to get a ” carte grize” (gray card) for our car. In France there is no frequent road tax. They have toll roads (worth their money). The other thing you register a car on your name you have to pay a certain onetime amount. This amount depends on the car (size, engine, pollution etc) and the town you register it. In our case it was 320 euro for the Peugeot 307.

Then after waiting for 40 minutes in line I came to a desk with a lady asking me what I wanted. After telling her she gave me another paper to fill out (the same data as on the ones I filled out before). But I figured this other form would end up at some other place. However when I came to the teller the two form were stapled together. This to me was the ultimate form of bureaucracy. Two forms with exactly the same data stapled together!

Then I needed to check for a new license plate. For this I was directed to some truck. There was an old man in the midst of hundreds of license plates. He spoke in a non understandable French (for me). He asked me something I couldn’t understand. He checked my new “carte grize” and said I didn’t need a new license plate. This is the story how we got our car.